But before I start ranting about all the unproductive activities that I did, I would like to thank whoever or whatever the force or the 'magic' that made me passed ALL my modules for this semester. I ACTUALLY PASSED MY AUDIO PRODUCTION! What a miracle!!! This is totally luck and blessings man. I always thought that it is a doomed module for me, it turned out to be a narrow escape indeed. Really, really great thanks and appreciation and gratitude etc....

For work wise, yea, totally unproductive. A month is ending and yet I have not generated any sales from my downlines. In fact, I crashed my organisation with my own hands again. Yes, again. Last month I took a week to crash an organisation of 5, this month I took a month to crash an organisation of 8. No wonder why I am labelled the Destructive Girl...

Well, there's a lot of unhappiness that occured and negativity that surrounded me, causing me to be emotional...Too much to be typed in fact. Whats the weirdest or maybe i should say shocking thing is that all these overwhelming feelings just shot me at a go and in fact, I feel that all these feelings just destroyed me instantly...Not only did I doubted myself, my ability, my confidence was totally shaken and I would say that the feeling was as though reaching the bottleneck of the limits that I could take.

I lost my goals, I could no longer see my dreams, I have lost my vision and purpose, but in front of him, I know it is ridiculous to show and give up because of all these downs and emo-ism. I know that I have to act tough, I have to act as though Im fine and strong. I do know that he is coming all the way down to help me, and in fact trying to use harsh methods on me to make me break through my limits. Really thanks to him. His method is really effective I would say, to put me on tough means as a form of wake up call for me to improve and to know how weak I am...